Archive for August, 2008

You better stop masturbating

Monday, August 25th, 2008

I found this handy little web page today on Reddit. The number one health problem in America is masturbation. They even have charts and facts to prove it!! If you are of the group that does not believe masturbation will make you go blind then this is a funny read for sure. If you are of the group that sees hair on the palms of teenagers and future rapists at every corner then this is the proof you need to continue your loony rampage.

Either way everyone should check it out! I was amused. It is a Christian web site and safe for work, well assuming terrible web design is safe at work!

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The Olympics suck

Thursday, August 21st, 2008

I hate the Olympics. The amount of money wasted on wasteful buildings and fireworks is very lame! 300 million alone on the opening ceremonies is what I read! That is crazy! The worst part is those competing in the games. They dedicate and ruin there lives just to swim across a pool or jump on some playground equipment. That is very sad to me! Some of the gymnasts don’t even hit puberty due the the training. Athletes are drugged against their will and without knowing. As far as I can tell the Olympics have no value what so ever.

What about the international comradeship… blah blah blah. BS!! All the nations do is piss and moan and complain about each other for the most part. What if we took all this focused talent, piles of cash and sense of pride and made a car that got over 40 miles to the gallon and was bigger than a flea! Oh lets also do something crazy and make it affordable! If this silly effort was pointed in a different direction we would already have people on Mars and cars that were cheap, long lasting and non polluting.

So you can take the Olympics and stick it. Below is a video from The Onion that just about sums up the sickness and stupidity I think the Olympics are!

Need proof… Link. I am not sure how accurate this is but it paints the picture I am getting at.


Chinese Officials: Deadly Virus Sweeping China Is Just Olympic Fever

Posted in General Bitching | No Comments »

Tree man - way freaky

Tuesday, August 12th, 2008

So a guy named Dede from Indonesia got a wart one day. Then it got a little infection. Dede had a common human papillomavirus and in conjunction with a rare immune deficiency he started to grow wood looking warts. He had them growing out of control from his face, hands and leg. The good news is they are doing surgery and he is getting a whole lot better. This kind of shit just makes you jump. It could happen to anyone at any time.

Here are the pictures and story.

Video link

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VistaPrint blows

Friday, August 8th, 2008

I have had it and am never again in this lifetime getting anything printed at vistaprint.com. I am have reached my limit and can no longer be marketing rapped by them. Every fucking time you place an order 30 offers, specials and crap pop up. It is insane! The amount shit they push at you is vulgar. Porn sites must take cues from VistaPrint. Even without the assault their web site is crap. It is impossible to navigate and cluttered beyond all understanding.

So I figured I must not be the only one that hates clicking for an exta 20 minutes just trying to get through all thier shit so I can place an order. I thought I would call them and see if they had a web portal that did not rap me everytime I used it. I like the quality of work and turnaround but I don’t need custom ball cups and what ever the hell else they want to sell me. I called the number, went through the menu and pressed 4. I did not want help with an order, I did not want to place anew order I just wanted to ask if they had a different web portal. 4 was the option for all “other questions”. Guess what! 4 just repeats the fucking menu. So I pressed 4 again because I still have a “other question”. I did it 5 times just to make sure I was not missing something. No, it is a phone cue loop. Unless you want to place an order they are in every way telling you to piss off.

So good bye VistaPrint. Kiss my ass. They are a prime time marketing overkill assult machine if ever I saw one.

Do you think VistaPrint and Windows Vista are cousins? I’m just saying….

Posted in Design >Bad, General Bitching | No Comments »

WTF - I guess eggs can be scary!

Thursday, August 7th, 2008

I don’t even know what to say about this. It is way at the top of the completely messed up charts!

Click here

The crappy web site was gettting hit pretty hard so if it does not work at first try again.

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Paris Hilton for President

Wednesday, August 6th, 2008

Cool now Paris Hilton is running for president. Apparently she did not like McCain slandering her so she decided to do a little slander herself. For the record, Paris you are not hot. Good looking I will give you but girl you are a damn stick. Eat a donut, grow some hips and tits and call me!

I guess everyone is running for president now?

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

Posted in Funny videos | No Comments »